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You might add vacuous to the list of Mom's characteristics.We weren't physically abused or anything. Well, at least not much. We had pretty much what all kids had except that our folks seemed like they were counting the days until we were old enough to live on our own and they could be seen to have fulfilled their parental responsibilities. The time I'm thinking about, we'd just turned fourteen – oh, by the way, we're twins – so they were going to be saddled with us for three more years until they could ship us off to some college; the further away the better.Do I sound like I'm whining and wallowing in self-pity? I'm not. Alexandra and I – I call her Allie - had long since come to a consensus on what we thought was the secret to surviving our family. If we played it cool and hung together we could do OK on our own and not be a 'burden' to our folks who clearly would rather be doing anything other than raising kids. Is it any wonder that we clung to each other?Our daily routine. Hard. So I knew he wanted me, that he was just too much of a nice guy to try anything. You know what? I wanted HIM to try. He didn’t, though, until we decided marriage was what we expected together.That brings me to the fourth wow. Sex. Like I came alive. Like up to this point in life, I’d been looking at pictures of mountains and now I’m actually LIVING in them. It’s real, and I could see how somebody might really like this, and gosh, it’s not like the thrills of “oh, this is new and a little bit forbidden” that marked my first experiences, and my husband NEVER took me to the mountaintops like Josh did.And now he’s asleep beside me. We’re only covered in a sheet, concession to the balmy night temperatures. I can touch him and I know that if I touch him and he awakes, there are no limits, no ‘Oops, sorry. Forgot I wasn’t sleeping by myself’ that have happened several times with us sharing the only bed on this houseboat.So I touch him. I let my hand trace HIS body. Not one of those.
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